10 Worst Ways To Behave At Concerts: How You’re Ruining It For Everyone
May 2nd, 2008
The other day I took a look at my positively RAMMED spring/summer concert calendar and my left nostril promptly flared to the size of a grapefruit. Concert season is a time for excitement, but at the same time it’s a time for frustration and cynicism. These days you have to brace yourself for an experience easily ruined by the fans themselves, who (from what I’ve seen) have become a rude and unruly lot entirely unaware of everyone else’s personal space. I now present you with ten rules that people blatantly disobey, or, ways that you’re ruining it for everyone else.
1. Recording the show or incessantly taking photos with your cell phone. I honestly don’t know why people do this. The photo quality of the majority of cell phones is terrible. I certainly didn’t pay $30-100 for my ticket just to watch it through a 3×2 inch screen with your extended arm as an obstruction, why did you? Are you honestly ever going to look at those photos again? And when you do, will you even be able to recognize the tiny speck that’s centre stage as Alex Turner of Arctic Monkeys? Will you be able to tell you’re at a Spice Girls reunion concert instead of the New Kids On the Block reunion concert? No. Ditto for people who record entire songs on a shitty camera for future uploading to YouTube. 90% of these videos are unwatchable. Check out this “sweet” four-and-a-half minute footage from a recent Yelle show that someone shot and uploaded for our viewing pleasure. In case you couldn’t make it out, the song Yelle’s performing in the clip is “Je Veux Te Voir”.
2. Waiting until the show has started to secure your spot in the front row. People line up outside general admission venues hours, sometimes even DAYS, before the show in order to snag that prime spot from which to enjoy a show that they’ve likely been waiting to see for much longer than you. In the Land of the Fair, It’s called waiting your f**king turn. So when one is rammed at the front, standing shoulder to shoulder with thousands of sweaty mouth breathers is uncomfortable enough without your conga line of friends charging through the crowd claiming, “Oh, my friend’s up there!”. It’s like when you’re late for a movie and making a huge production of finding a seat after the lights have gone down. It’s rude. And no, if you’ve scored a front row spot, you cannot ever leave to use the washroom or get a drink. You’ve sealed your fate - you’ll never make your way back.
“Hey! Can you hear this? It’s Pearl Jam. This is what you’re missing. Wish you were here. OMG do you hear? They’re playing Even Flow. Listen!!” *puts phone up to speaker*
3. Talking throughout the entire show. Speaking of rude: No one’s saying you have to stand there like a wax statue with your arms folded, intently concentrating on every lyric and chord. But we could do without the people who feel the need to constantly natter to their friends throughout the show, especially at smaller shows where the band can HEAR you not paying attention. There have even been shows where the band stopped playing to ask people to STFU. Embarrraaaaaassssing! It’s like people who talk in class…why are you even there? Go stand at the back near the bar if you want to chat.
4. Being over 6′4 and choosing to stand in front of the shortest person in the crowd. You can’t fault people for being tall (or too short), but why does the tallest person usually have a complete disregard for where they’re standing? If you see a 5′0 tall girl, don’t stand directly in front of her. Maybe kneel? Maybe lop off your legs at the shins? Or better yet, maybe just stand behind her? The same goes for girls who insist on sitting on their boyfriends’ shoulders for the duration of the show. The band might appreciate it when you show them your boobies, but the entire audience behind you will just think you’re a boob. Thanks for blocking my view, dink.
5. Continually crowd surfing or slam dancing even though it’s not that kind of show. You can only be dropped straight to the ground and then hoisted back up so many times by your fellow concert-goers before it gets exhausting for everyone involved. Some people are actually trying to enjoy themselves and not worry about getting an errant boot or elbow to the head while trying to gently guide you towards safety. Save it for Lollapalooza or some other monster UK festival. Ditto to people who mosh and slamdance at shows like Crystal Castles or Klaxons. Don’t make me show you the black eye I got at a seemingly “tame” Malajube show.
6. Being an unruly lout. Everyone knows all about the one dude who stands at the back of the venue and yells “WOOO! YES!!!” during the band’s between-song banter and at the start of every song, regardless of whether he can recognize it. What’s worse is when that dude brings along all of his rabblerousing buddies, and they get to the venue early to get their drink on. By the time the show starts they’re slurring their words and sloshing their drinks, bumping into people and stomping on toes. Get a hold of yourselves, people! Try to make it to the encore without blacking out, please.
7. Spastic dancing and general disregard for personal space. We know you wanna dance. And we WANT you to dance and have a good time. But take a moment to look around and size up the amount of space you have to work with and adjust your movement accordingly. If it’s Daft Punk and everyone’s going ballastic, go ahead and join in. If the crowd’s tightly packed and there’s no room to dance, bop along, maybe try to start a mini-dance party, but now’s not the time to start flipping your hair like a stripper, breakdancing or practising the Soulja Boy dance.
8. Holding up a sign or flag for the duration of the show. This practice is especially popular at any British indie band show. Suddenly everyone’s a raving fan of the Union Jack and has brought along a humongous silk flag to prove it. Not only that, but they want to make sure the band is aware of their nationalism. Then you have the people who write deeply personal messages for the band on bristolboard and hold it up in the hopes that the guitarist will fall in love with them. Nope - the only thing you’ll feel from behind is hate.
9. Standing at a seated venue. Look, I go to a lot of shows. Almost all of them are general admission/standing. I look forward to sitting at the 10% of venues that have seats. So for the love of god, please don’t LEAP out of your seat the moment the band hits the stage and remain standing for the entire set. Stand for a couple of songs and then sit back down. The domino effect is really strong on this one - it’s kind of hard to convince an entire audience to sit down, and once one row is up, others are sure to follow, meaning anyone who’s too tired or short to see anything while standing won’t get to see anything if they stay in their seats.
10. Waiting till the band plays their radio hit and then leaving . A lot of times the band comes to town early in their career and they already know that you only came to see them for one song. But humour them and feign some interest in the rest of their material - it’s all near and dear to them; it just happens that one of their songs is being pimped out by their label or the local radio station. Several tours later, they’re probably already sick of playing it anyway, and want you to latch onto something new. If they haven’t saved it for the encore, after which there would be a natural exit break, don’t start a mass exodus out of the venue. The other songs might crash and burn, but emergency exits should only be used in case of actual fire.
Anything else that’s ruining your live show experience that I’ve missed here?
Photograph Courtesy Getty Images
Posted on Friday, May 2nd, 2008 at 10:14 am by Kat and is filed under Concerts & Events.
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297 Responses to “10 Worst Ways To Behave At Concerts: How You’re Ruining It For Everyone”
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Point number 4-
your view: everyone let me see.
everyone’s view: go there earlier and get a spot in front, youy dwarf. Stop whining.
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I’ve been photographing concert for years, both for professional and personal purposes. One of the worst live concert trends are people who incessantly take pictures using the bright LCD screens on all digital cameras — or worse yet with constant flash! This is horribly distracting in a dark club and — in the case of flash — horribly rude to the performer. I realize that many digital cameras do not have an optical view finder and thus no alternative to using the screen. In which case, take pictures for a few songs, then put the camera away. While I absolutely respect a person’s right to take photos, there is a point at which excessive picture taking becomes annoying. How many pictures of any artist does one need? Of course, given how random some of this photography appears to be, it may take 1000 shots to get one decent picture.
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Yes! Nailed it, great pics too. F.cking idiots.
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Check out the book “No Air Guitar Allowed” I just wrote. This book is a great book regarding this same subject.
I am a huge concert fan and this book is written for the fans. You will never laugh harder! See which character you are? Check it out at noairguitarallowed.com or myspace/music search no air guitar.
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the one about the girl on the shoulders is especially true. i was at a Pearl Jam show, and this one girl would not get off her boyfriend’s shoulders. she was blocking a bunch of people’s view, and people were yelling at her to get down. she wouldn’t so people started throwing drinks at her. once a few hit her, she finally relented, and got down.
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Are you kidding me? All of you guys are whiny little bitches. That’s how shows are and if you don’t like it then stay the fuck home.
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Well said. And to everyone who is critical of the article, here’s the thing: does behaving like a complete jerk and ruining the show for everyone else make you feel better about yourself? If so, you’re a pretty pathetic human being. Maybe at the next show, someone will screw *you* over and ruin *your* experience. It’s not all about you. And by the way, your behavior doesn’t impress the bands, if that’s what you’re trying for. They just think you’re low class trash who have no respect for them or their fans.
I sometimes wonder why some of these people even turn up at concerts. If you really want to talk or text through the entire show, you obviously don’t care about the show. Just stay home.
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Quit your bitching, it’s rock n’ roll goddamnit, you’re allowed to do whatever you want even if it’s stupid. THAT’S THE WHOLE POINT, RULE MAN.
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Good article. Let me say, to all you say, “shut up this is what concerts are”, and the like.
I have routinely beat the holy hell out of people for these behaviors (after asking them to stop). I will be at every show you are at.
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I hope I never go to concerts with half the people that have commented here; I got annoyed with them just reading that they love to piss people off!
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I agree. Most of these things are just common courtesy, but I have to say, I experience most of these every time I go to a show. It doesn’t mean I don’t still have a good time, but it’s still aggravating.
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See, here’s the thing — while I totally agree that the behaviors listed above are obnoxious when exhibited in excess, I find that my concert experiences are more often ruined by people’s disproportional reactions to them then the offenses themselves. For every thing you list, there is an inverse behavior that’s just as obnoxious:
1. Look, if it wasn’t their camera-phone they were holding up, it’d be their lighter, and if it wasn’t a lighter, it would be their fingers. I attended many a show before anyone had a cell-phone, and, yes, even then, most concerts were witnessed through peoples raised arms. It’s just something people do at concerts. I’m more distracted by the altercation that results when someone tells someone to cut it out than by the errant raised hand.
2. Not everybody has the spare time or freaky obsessiveness to show up days in advance — and that doesn’t mean they like the music any less than you, they just don’t display it with the same adolescent anti-social zeal you do. Should they be punished for their mental health by never getting to spend a minute up towards the front? Should the guy who got stuck at work and showed up at the last minute not be able to watch a show with his friends because people are so possessive of their spot on the floor? Wouldn’t it be better if everyone just chilled the fuck out, showed up at a reasonable time, and didn’t treat the first row like a prize to be claimed and protected? Me, I don’t care about being up front, and my concerts are often ruined by getting pushed and shoved around by the crush on the floor caused by the assholes jockying for position — and, no, being up front doesn’t mean you’re not one of those assholes.
3. Wanna know what’s worse than the guy a couple rows in front of you buzzing in his friend’s ear for a while? The people who violently shush people in a manner that is 5 times louder and lasts twice as long as the inciting conversation. Seriously — just like I didn’t go to the show to listen to some guy talk, I also didn’t go to observe your self-righteous indignation, so I don’t appreciate your flying off the handle at the first whisper, as if you were just sitting their waiting for someone to give you the excuse to demonstrate just how much more you want to hear the band than everybody around you.
4. So you’re short. That sucks. Makes it hard to see at concerts, I imagine, and that’s frustrating. Here’s the thing — that doesn’t give you the right to act like it’s everybody else’s problem. First of all, I’m 6′ even, and I usually see more of the back of someone’s head than the band, so I don’t know if your expectations are realistic. Secondly, if you’re 5′1″, and you wind up behind me, maybe you should move. I’m not standing in front of you on purpose, I’m just trying to find a spot on the floor to watch the music in peace. Your ticket gives you the right to attend the show, not tell everyone where they can and can’t stand.
5. Ok, absolutely, people who mosh inappropriately are obnoxious. There are some shows where it’s just not the thing to do. Know what’s just as annoying? People who rush up right in front of the stage, and then act surprised and indignant when people want to slam dance and crowd surf around them. These things really only happen up front, where it’s most crowded — if you want to avoid them, maybe you shouldn’t cling to that spot up front that you seem to care so much about.
6. Unruly louts are annoying. So are brittle assholes who think anyone who breathes on them is an unruly lout, and ends up shoving me into the people behind me because I’m drinking a beer and I got knocked into them. Just try to keep your reactions to the unruly proportional, ok?
7. Look, I know you want stand there and mouth the lyrics to the songs while staring intently at either the band or your shoes. Furthermore, I know how much you want us to notice how intensely and personally you feel the music. That’s swell. I’m sure there are plently of shoegaze acts where this is the norm. Here’s the thing — if the music’s got a beat, people are going to want to dance to it. So please, don’t be one of those annoying schmucks who plants themselves in the middle of the floor and then elbows or shoves anybody who dances near them, all the while acting disdainful and put out. If people are dancing around you, and you don’t want to dance, move.
8. Ok, signs are just annoying. I’m totally with you on that one. A bit of advice, though: try not to act like a shrill prick when asking someone to put a sign down, because all your accomplishing by acting self-righteously indignant right off the bat is making the guy hold the sign higher, and longer.
9. Oh, seriously, you’ve got to be kidding me. It’s a fucking concert. If you want to sit down while listening, you might as well stay home, or become a classical music fan. If you go to a rock concert, you’ve got to expect that people are going to stand. That’s what people do at rock concerts. Look, I really don’t care how many concerts you go to — don’t be one of those assholes who are the only people seated, and yet bitch the entire time about the people standing in front of them.
10. Uh, does this really happen? I’ve been to a lot of shows, and have never noticed people leaving after the band plays their single. I mean, come on — who pays a $15 cover to hear one song? This type of lame attempt at musical elitism just discredits the rest of your complaints. Look, I get that you’re really into your music. That’s awesome. But please understand that the attitudes your copping doesn’t mean you’re more into the the music than anybody else, it just means you’re a bigger douche.
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Two ruiners I didn’t see mentioned are the idiots with the laser pointers who seem to think messing with the band is more fun than listening to the music *plus* people (usually drunk guys, but sometimes drunk girls) that try to dance by throwing elbows … (You know who you are!)
BTW, the people here who say they’ll do whatever they want at a concert and to stop whining — I’m the guy that got the bouncer to toss you out of the concert!! Most of the drunks are underage or military (i.e. prone to fighting others) who aren’t going to even remember the show, so why let them ruin for everyone else — Bye bye!!
Anyone who thinks that buying a ticket means they don’t have to care about others and can start Idiot Dancing — watch it from the other side of the fence!!
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All the people that just keep saying that they’ll keep doing what they’re doing that this person is obviously annoyed by are utter morons. If you’d like the writer to shut up agree. Writers thrive more on people disagreeing with them and therefore are twice as likely to write something similar if it seems like a lot of people are disagreeing with them.
Also, if a tall person is ahead of me in a concert I usually just move (I’m barely 5′1) but if there’s nowhere to move I usually ask if I can stand in front of them, since it’s not like I’ll block their view anyway, and I’ve never had a problem with it.
I do agree that people need perhaps a bit of a lesson in common courtesy, especially the people who talk through the entire show. It’s like, we all paid money to be here and want to enjoy the show and if you’re talking through the entire thing you’re not only ruining it for the people around you, but you’re ruining it for yourself, by not paying attention. I think it just shows a gross lack of disrespect for the band or artist performing.
There are always drunk people at concerts. Is it annoying? Hell yes it is. But if that’s the only way they can enjoy their concert, what can you do, really?
Finally, if you don’t like the idea of rules at a concert why even read something with the title of “10 Worst Ways to Behave at Concerts: How You’re Ruining It For Everyone.” Stop being a douchebag and going out of your way to be a little dick and read things that you’re interested in, and those of us that agree wholeheartedly or with certain points will read and agree.
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You forgot the single most annoying way to behave at a concert: throw a coke-fuelled hissy fit temper tantrum and keep the audience waiting four extra hours before finally getting on stage and being crap anyway, Grace Jones.
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I agree with you on every single one of these points, and would like to add one more. I attended a concert by The Living End a couple of years back, and two major factors ruined it for me. Both involved the audience. One, there was a bunch of shirtless, drunk-ass kids who pushed aside a huge portion of the crowd just to run around in circles and bash into each other. This forced everyone else to practically stand on top of each other. Secondly, I got the Hopoate treatment by a scrag who wanted to push in front of me. Dude, if you wanted to be in front, you should have gotten there earlier. Don’t stick your finger up my arse. EVER. Not unless you want to be smacked.
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I was at Isle of Wight 2007 for the epic Rolling Stones and when the stage moved out into the crowd i was a couple of rows from the front of it. Guess what? It got ruined by the planks with their mobiles.
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i like cookies
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Great article. I can say that the crowd doesn’t welcome always the guys who are jumping in from the stage. Sometimes, the crowd makes an empty space for them…
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oh i so agree!i had a guy smoking in my hair!and he almost burnt me but instead got the guy beside me.it was crazy.i understand having a good time but jeez!i was as high as anyone and i didnt smush any burning objects on my fellow bonnaroo-ers.
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its so funny that people who disagree with you say “let them enjoy the concert the way they want” when they dont let you enjoy it the way you want. i dont go to concerts, but i have gone to two and only two bands are good enough for me to go to because of the stupid fans.
i dont care if we all dance, jump or sway a little but shoving and pushing and moshing in the front is ridiculous and stupid and you DO NOT see the band or even hear the music when you do all of that!
our society is going to far down when its status quo to act like a douchebag idiot.
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you missed the nasty sweaty guy squirming his way through the crowd w/ not shirt on…that guy sucks
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Really well written!
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you know what pisses me off at concerts? racism. oh yeah it’s there, cuz i’m asian and i get disrespected by white kids all the time. or maybe it’s cuz i’m not scene, i just look different.
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Fangirls. You forgot the fangirls.
They will eat your soul./claw your eyes out to get to that hawt111 band member.
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Wow, you should have NO FUN written on the back of your head. It brings up the question why do you even go to shows because from what you have written it seems that you would have a better time sitting at home watching a live performance on tv.
When people are dancing they usually do it up front in an area that is clearly designated for that purpose. If you don’t like it move. Perhaps the most annoying thing I have witnessed at concerts is a**holes like you telling me not to dance. If you don’t want to dance thats fine but don’t tell me not to. Understand many shows “violent” dancing is not only OK but encouraged it is your job to get out of the way if you don’t want to be a part of it.
Also annoying are the people that have the spare time to arrive early then won’t let me close to the stage. ITS OPEN SEATING that means no one has the right to stop anyone from moving to where they want to be.
The rock and roll community has a word for people like you BUZZKILL. -
At reading last year, close to the bar in NME, two girls behind sat down in the middle of the set and smoked- whilst a band was playing. When we all started dancing they got pissy and jabbed a smoke in my friends leg—– MOST cockish thing ive ever heard of at a festival.
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I think theres validity to both sides of the argument here, personally i believe it depends on the type of music and show, youve just got to use your common sense for which of these are acceptable for the event you are at, sometimes it is rock and roll, and can actually add the the experience for me personally,even if its someone else crowd surfing or whatever. to all the people saying its just part of rock and roll, well some of it can be some of it isnt and some of it is only sometimes depending on the gig. to all the people hating on these guys, go to some proper gigs like metal or something once in a while you might find out that some of this behaviour is just part of the music (and might have some fun!). i also have a one to add: one wasted person threw up on the floor, before the headliners had even come on right all over my feet.
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You need to consider the types of shows that you attend and decide wether you are prepared for the possibilities that these things might happen to you. Unfourtunatley sometimes people do get hurt at concerts and festivals that become quite physical but if the fan base is mainly those kinds of people then why should you have a problem with it? If you dont like it just move away. Try not to make a fuss, have a good time, and if youre not, thats your fault. You paid, you came, now enjoy it. Whatever the consequences.
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You sound like a fucking uptight prick. Stop your bitching, and enjoy the music.
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I think the only behavior missing is being excessively inebriated or under the influence of drugs. There is nothing worse than a crowd reeking like marijuana and vomit because someone people think the concert wouldn’t be quite entertaining enough sober.
On another note, I’m definitely the person that stands up in seated venues. If you’re at a concert for a band you love, you should be too excited to sit down. I can’t control it. I have to stand up and dance.
-K
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You forgot about being “that” couple… the overly amorous couple who likes to stand in strategically horrible places at concerts and try to taste each others’ previous meals while they are digesting. Their classless dry humping (and sometimes more) induces nausea and ruins the concert for everyone.
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Point #4 - I agree with the girlfriends on boyfriend’s shoulders claim, but tall people can’t help the fact that they’re tall. Suck it up. They’re not sacrificing their comfort for your convenience.
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#11 — the douchbag who sits around getting all pissy about what everyone else is doing so he can go home and write a blog post about it
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So fucking true. Good taste in music as well! You missed that one person that tries to stop everyone from moving completely. I recently saw the Silversun Pickups and there was this dumbass guy beside me the whole time trying to stop people from moving and bumping into him. I don’t think he even realized he was at a concert. I got pushed into him and he looked at me and said, “No.”, I said, “What?” he said, “You’re not going in front of me”…I got bumped into him…I WAS at the front already and there wasn’t even room in front of him to move to…fuck I hate those people.
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You forgot the people who mosh to EVERYTHING. I don’t mind seeing a heavy metal band and there being a mosh pit but when I go see an emo or pop band I don’t want some sweaty, shirtless, drunk guy crashing into me every 3 seconds.
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I’m a small 5′3″ chick and it pisses me off when people try to push me into a mosh pit. I’m too tiny for that shit, so screw off! If I don’t want to mosh then leave me the f**k alone! Not to mention I came here to listen to a band I like, not to run around hitting people/being hit. I almost always bring 2-3 guys with me to concerts to ‘protect’ me because of this and I don’t feel I should have to.
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rule 4 is bullshit. i’m 6′8″ and love concerts, but at shows with a less active crowd (anything not metal/punk/ska usually), i catch all kinds of shit from people who get stuck behind me. it’s not my fault that i’m tall, and no i’m not intentionally trying to screw you out of a view. i will not, however, stand in the very goddamn back of the venue just so i don’t offend someone. before you bitch at someone taller than you, (ESPECIALLY at a concert with moshing) remember that they’ve been hearing that shit all night long, and their elbows are right about at the level of your face. if it’s that big of an issue, MOVE.
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Nah, some of this is ridiculous. I don’t see the point recording stuff on your phone, but people can do what they like.
The only thing that proper frustrates me is GIRLS WITH MASSIVE HAIR OR HEELS. Why wouldn’t you tie it up or wear some flats? Not only do I always end up with a faceful of hair and toes crushed into oblivion but you honestly must be in the most pain EVER gurrlz, heels hurt and your hair is getting tugged all over the place. Silly.
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the camera phone thing applies for all aspects of life. a few snaps here and there is okay but dont get the point why people need to look thru a phone all the time.
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Agree with you on all of them except #9. Seats at a rock show are a huge mistake, save them for when Creedence Clearwater Revisited comes to town.
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I agree 100% with most of the points, except number 9. I guess it depends on what kind of show it is. For example, when I went to see The Doors two years ago it was in a theatre, but still it seemed an insult to remain sat while they were playing, as if they were a mere entertainment. But seeing it from another point of view, there are some shows that are meant to be enjoyed sitting, for example Damien Rice. I feel it depends on what kind of artist you’re seeing.
Do the classical “Show me your boobs” or “Marry me” morons classify under point number 6?
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If you don’t like that shit then stop going to concerts.
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WOW!!! looks like someone DOESN’T know how to have a good time!! Bitch all u want and next time u want to go to a concert just stay home and save urself the 30 dollars and all the complaints that come along with ur egotistical self to think ur going to get privacy at a venue with 50 thousand people…. shame on u
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These things are all unconventional and sometimes border-line annoying, sure. But I don’t have a problem with them seeing as I can just adjust to them by moving or getting off my ass instead of being lazy.
The thing that TRULY pisses me off? The whiners who moan and bitch at you when you’re just trying to enjoy the show the best you can. Someone shoving me does not ruin my mood at a show, but someone complaining and snapping at me does.
Let them be. If everyone followed these rules, concerts would not be concerts. -
11. whistles at raves
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