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There I was eating dinner last night, flipping through all 28 channels of my basic cable when I stumbled upon the premiere episode of 13 Fear Is Real. Have you heard of this? Never watch it. I’ve seen enough reality TV, you guys, and I know what works. This show is trash, but not the kind I want to watch.

So a bunch of contestants are thrown into the Louisiana wilderness, and a voice straight out of the Saw movies explains that through a series of tests, the players will be “killed off” one by one. Weak. Your metaphorical elimination fails to amuse. Back in the woods, the people “discover” a decrepit cabin and wonder if they should stay there. Despite their knowledge that bad things always happen in old cabins in the woods, they make themselves comfortable.

Next, the Voice plays a game with them, wherein half end up blindfolded and tied in the woods and the other half must seek them out. The last pair to return would be up for “execution”. Most players are already gasping with fear, especially the captured. I know dark woods are frightening and all, but I think at this point in the game I’d still be giggling, knowing that it’s all a TV show, even if I was blindfolded to a chair. Dude, there’s probably a producer nearby. Nobody’s gonna get slaughtered.

Anyway, the whole thing is super lame and my brain soon wandered to my laptop instead, but I think two girls ended up being “buried alive”, and one was eliminated. In the end, someone will win $66,666 (ooooOOOooo), and the show will never be seen again. Basically, if you still love Blair Witch and you believe that these people are actually in danger, you may enjoy it.

Check out a teaser:

Did you watch? Did you like it and I just ripped it apart? If so, feel free to share your opinion in the comments!

Posted on Thursday, January 8th, 2009 at 1:33 pm by Wendy and is filed under We <3 TV.

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