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Uh yeah, a “wardrobe malfunction.”

Let’s just say that a hypothetical person (myself), sleepy and ready to go home at the end of the day, puts her coat on to find that the sleeves have been TAPED SHUT (very methodically) by another hypothetical-type person (new guy Kerry). Yes, I laughed. Then I emailed him to tell him that I fractured a hypothetical finger (middle) and was thus unable to give him my customary greeting. Then, Hypothetical Kerry gives me a get-well card and a bunch of flowers. Aw, Kerry, how’d ya know? I LOVE FLOWERS. Therefore, the winner? Me. I got a laugh AND flowers. Note to Kerry: I always win.

And finally, tomorrow’s April Fool’s Day! “Errybody in the club get tipsy!” J-Kwon said it - you guys do it. Doo it.

Let’s get silly.
xo

Thank You April,

I have been avoiding posting for days. The aforementioned candy was result of my birthday that happened on Friday. Well, it really all happened 30 years ago at 8:10PM at the Yarmouth General Hospital. After 2 short hours of labour my mother, Jeri-Lynn Cunningham (shout out), gave birth to a bouncing baby boy named…Kerry. Yeah, yeah I know it?s a girl’s name but I was fully tucked and once you’re named, you’re named. My father, Adlai, named after U.S. vice president Adlai Stevenson, was so excited about the life he had brought into the world he crashed his mother’s Dodge (not a product placement) on the way home. And the rest is history!
Sorry about that. I find it is hard to understand a?new person to the blog?without a lil? back story. Anyway, I had a great birthday! I received lots of candy and balloons, the Belle And Sebastian Fans Only DVD (buy it…doo it) and lots of love from everyone. Especially people who are candy fans here.
I am so new here that all I really have to say right now is watch MuchTakeOver next week and vote for fellow Nova Scotia resident Nick. What a freak!

Hannah fractured her finger in a wardrobe malfunction. So send Get Well cards and flowers here to Much C/O Hannah Sung. Thanks and I will NEVER post again. N E V E R.

I’d like to give a big shout out to my favourite fashionistas, Nikki Green (yes I’m still stalkin Nikki. Apparently she’s been trying to ditch me but whatever…I’m on to that play)  & ‘lil Luciw for another amazing Wedge session. Death Cab representin’…

So…the date of the MMVAs has been released…Sunday, June 20. From this moment on my days will be consumed with MMVA madness. Here’s an idea…..why don’t you tell us who you’d like to see present at this year’s show. I’d like to see Scarlett Johannson, Topher Grace, Zooey Deschanel, Gael Garcia Bernal and Kieran Culkin (whatever happened to Igby?).  And of course the boys from Sum 41! Drop an email to Soph-the-loaf-dope and we’ll discuss.

Mood…crashing quickly.  Must have bed & cookies…

For the last 3 day’s I’ve eaten nothing but candy. It all started with some dude called Kerry…what you sayin Kerry? Intro yourself to the kids.

Speaking of…I highly recommend you go see the original - saw it in the 80’s [I was extremely young, of course ;-)] Anyone remember the big rolly-polly dude that fell in the water fountain at the shopping mall? hee hee! I actually can’t wait to see the new one. Hope everyone has an amazing weekend…I’ll be working - YAY!!!

Requesting permission to jump on the Dawn of the Dead bandwagon!

I’ve had zombies on the brain for the past two weeks. Before that I was an innocent, zombie-free happy-go-lucky smiley pants.

Then I saw the trailer for the Dawn of the Dead remake, or “re-envisioning”. You know, the one with the creepy little zombie girl. *shudders*

Then I started seeing (sorry - imagining) zombies in my hallway at night. Then, I wrote a zombie escape plan in my written journal in case they ever infest my apartment building. Yes, I seriously did that. But it’s pretend, of course. Heh heh…heh…

Then I started reading about the movie. I read the original screenplay. I read a whole bunch of in depth reviews.  I visited the website for the new version and played the games. (Well, one of the games. The second one freaked me out too much and I almost peed my pants when I died in the first one). I started seriously thinking about watching both versions (and I haaaaaaate gore. I can’t watch it. But CSI is starting to desensitize me).

I am a Dawn of the Dead expert who has never seen the movie. And yes, I am a very, very sorry excuse for a human being. (Maybe it?s cause I?m a ZOMBIE)

Not to start off on a down note but Elliot Smith’s murder suicide mystery really bums me out also Shelley.  Such a melody master Mr. Elliot was.  He had those same melody genes that my current kick The Beatles had.  It is weird I work on Vibe but my listening habits lately could not be further from the Vibe format.  The Beatles, Neil Young, Bob Dylan, the great masters are in my head these days, they remind me of my uncles who reared me towards these rock greats.  This usually happens to me a couple times a year where classic rock blows my mind, but seeing Kanye West this Friday could squash all my rock and roll fantasies and get my head bumpin again (just a note I have been also loving me some Doobie Brothers, Steely Dan, Little Feat, Ry Cooder and Faces as well these days). 

On Jason’s LA LA land stories, I got a good one that involves a mini celebrity encounter- in all sense of the word. George Stroum and I were down in Los Angeles shooting some stories and we were heading down Sunset Blvd in Hollywood, coming back from a Trail Of Dead show at The Troubador.   We hear this convertible with a booming system pull into a hotel in front of us.  In fact the car was bumpin some West Coast flavour, Warren G’s Regulate. We look over and in this convertible we see two tall blonds and some dude in the back.  I mention to George that noone was driving the car.  But I was wrong as we got closer driving the car was actor Verne Troyer (aka Mini Me from Austin Powers). And man was he loving the Warren G. Dancing, partying in true mini-Hollywood style.  Do you think this Ford Mustang flip top was specially made for Mini? 

Hey, check Vibe this Saturday (Mar 27) @ 2pm ET (or next Wed Mar 31 @ 9pm ET) - it is the “DJ Show” this week.  All about all things 1’s and 2’s.

I almost got run over this morning! Seriously! Walking across the street to work, with the light, and some great big-ass truck started turning right in front of me. I had to quickly walk backwards (and almost trip) in order to avoid certain death. The driver must have been looking the other way or something - crazy! The guy behind me commented sourly, “That’s our city!”. Are Torontonians particularly rude drivers? Maybe so.?

It seems like all anyone is talking about lately is Dawn Of The Dead. When you walk down the street you hear: “…and then the little girl reached up and took a bite out of…” or “…after the old lady dies, she suddenly rises up and…”. I can’t remember when zombies were this popular (maybe way back when Return of the Living Dead came out - “brrrrains! brrrrains!”). Saw the new Dawn this weekend - I’m not sure I liked it quite as much as Jason did, but it had its share of creepy, gooey moments. And the first 15 minutes are fantastic - The best of the whole film, in my opinion! Gotta love the original though. Slow, shambling zombies beat out the sprinting undead anyday.

Speaking of excruciating zombie death, these guys seem to be in quite a pickle. I hope they get out before, well, you know….

Rented The Outsiders this weekend - Remember when C. Thomas Howell and Rob Lowe were the hottest things ever? (Yes I’m dating myself, but didn’t everybody have to watch that film in elementary school?). Ponyboy and Sodapop and Two-Bit… Tom Cruise had a tiny role that essentially consisted of back-flips and muscle flexing. Did a fine job of it too. Crazy the amount of actors that started out in that great little film (not to mention director Francis Ford Coppola). Sofia Coppola makes a cameo as a whiny kid with buck teeth who’s only line is “Hey Mister, you got a dime?” She was definitely a weird-looking child.

Speaking of Sofia, inquiring minds want to know - Now that the uber-cool couple Sofia and Spike Jonze have split up, who are they gonna hook up with? I’m voting Tara Subkoff for Spike (actress and designer for Imitation of Christ). And as for Sofia, perhaps now if Johnny Lee Miller is REALLY through with Angelina Jolie (probably, anyway), he would make a great mate for Ms. Coppola. Suggestions?

Lastly, I hate to give in to paranoid, conspiracy-theory, alarmist, celeb-worship, but then this totally caught my eye. I was a huge Elliott Smith fan and was sad to hear of his death. Now it might be murder? Freaky.

First, I really can’t help but comment on the last two posts… Actually, I’ve been dying to comment…

Mike - Crystal is either going to tell you a) she’s really a dude, b) she’s pregnant, but not sure it’s yours so you’re going to take a paternity test on the show, or c) she’s an out of control teen and they’re sending her to bootcamp.? Since option ‘C’ happens mostly on the Sally Jesse Show (R.I.P.), my vote is that it’s option ‘A’, cause speaking as a producer, DNA paternity tests make for BORING TV. (Been there, done that).

Justin - I would love to have you write about your gay rights terrorist organization, the American Idol Contestants and how to write an angry letter all in your next blog…I can’t pick just one. Has anyone voted yet? Does anyone actually read this thing? Anyone??

Okay, now that those details are out of the way I can totally move on. Lemme tell you about my tales from La-La-Land and TinselTown where I was for 5 days with Rick - who was DEFINITELY NOT on vacation, even though the MOD folks were convinced that he was…

COOL THING #1
I came so close to meeting my idol Paris Hilton. Two times! The first time was when I found out that she was eating in Justin Timberlake’s restaurant the night before I was there.? She was sitting on the patio with her BF Nick Carter and Nicole Richie (her “Simple Life” co-star…) To make matters even MORE unbearable, I was staying in the hotel right above the resaurant and was sleeping right above the place where Paris was chilling out… Damn! I will never forgive myself for being too tired to go out.

The second time was when we were interviewing actor Kevin Zegers (who grew up in the Toronto area and is in the new movie “Dawn Of The Dead”, which is the best movie out right now! Seriously, go see it…It will freak you out! Kevin is really good in it too… I thought I would add that in case he ever reads this.) He told us that he just had breakfast with his friends Nick and Paris (Hello! Nick Carter and Paris Hilton) and that Paris Hilton wanted to come along to play golf (that’s what we did for the interview) cause she thought it would be a laugh… She couldn’t come cause she had to fly to Florida to start shooting “Simple Life 2″. Then I heard that she got hurt on a horse in Florida and I wished she would have just stayed in LA and played golf with Rick and Kevin for our interview.?

If you want to wach the golf game and hear Kevin talk more about “Dawn Of The Dead” check out the brand new special “Private Lives” this Saturday. Yes that was just me plugging my own show.
COOL THING #2
I have always been a big fan of Scooby Doo and when we were in LA Rick and I got to check out the real Mystery Machine that they use in the movie. Actually, they used 2 different Mystery Machines and we got to go in one of them. Then we hooked up with Matthew Lillard (who I am a big fan of and who was VERY sick with a stomach flu he got in Mexico), Seth Green (who says he loves watching MUCH whenever he is in Canada), Freddie Prinze Jr. (who is one of the nicest guys I have ever met) and Alicia Silverstone (who is too cool for words and is my new best friend - even though she has no idea).

I also got to see the movie while I was there and it is a lot of fun and way better than the first one. It was shot in Vancouver, but you probably won’t recognize anything since there is a lot of CG stuff… who knows, maybe you will recognize stuff then you can e-mail me and tell me I’m stupid for not recognizing anything… ok?

COOL THING #3
We got to hang out with Shawn Ashmore (Iceman from X-2) and his brother Aaron on Venice Beach.? I have hung out with the guys before in Toronto - but it was cool to visit Venice Beach with them. Wow! There are a lot of freaks there! I don’t know if you will be able to tell when you watch the “Private Lives” special (again, you should really watch it so that this whole post will make sense. You’ll be able to see all the things we did in London, New York and Los Angeles.) It was cool to find out about what they’re both working on… Aaron Ashmore stars in the new movie “Prom Queen” about Mark Hall who wanted to take his boyfriend to his Catholic High School Prom and then he sued the school board when they said ‘no’, and then he got to take him anyway. (Hey Justin, maybe you should get Mark involved in your gay rights terrorist group?). And I asked Shawn at least 5 times about X-3, but he can’t say anything and he can’t even say if the movie is going to happen. Hollywood is so hush-hush about these types of things… So, even if I did know something I totally wouldn’t be able to tell you… ok?

Wow! I’ve gone on for too long. Let me just wrap with this: What’s up with the creepy people in homemade superhero outfits (and one dirty SpongeBob wanna-be) that stand on Hollywood Blvd. outside the Chinese Theatre and the place where they have the Oscars and American Idol finals? Does anyone know what I’m talking about? Anyone???? …yuck!

wow that mike is a funny guy. what he doesn’t mention though is that he is an up and coming superstar musician. if you live around toronto you can go see him play live next thursday (march 25) at holy joes (queen and bathurst). wow that’s a lot of parenthesis (it’s a problem). i just can’t stop (not funny).
?
i’m not trying to get you to go see mike just because i get 15% of all his music career related profits (including merchandising!), i’m trying to get you to see mike because you’ll be blown away by his musical skills. and i get 15%.
?
since i work in promotions i feel i should take this opportunity to promote something. and i think it would be smart to promote something on our channels rather than something on our competitions’ channels. [ed. note: kiss-ass] so here is my viewing suggestion; if you haven’t watched it already, you must tune in to the surreal life on muchmoremusic. it is insane. i have seen all of the episodes already (one of the perks of working here) and it only gets weirder and weirder. at first you feel sorry for corey feldman, but quickly you realize that he is not human. he is one strange fellow and he cries a lot.
[ed. note: speaking of corey feldman, remember this?]
i’ve also seen season 2 (which will be on muchmoremusic in july) and it is even better! season 2 has vanilla ice (nutcase), eric estrada (annoying), tammy faye baker (medicated), traci bingham (silcone filled cougar), ron jeremy (built like a bear, hung like a horse) and some alcoholic girl from some reality show that i never saw. it’s the bestest show ever.
?
ok that was fun. maybe i’ll post again someday! you pick the topic and i’ll discuss it. here are your options:

1. my new gay-rights terrorist organization “the pink panthers”
2. american idol contestants
3. my tips on writing angry letters to the head office of corporations everywhere
4. pizza toppings

oh by the way, chris’ blog from earlier this week reminded me that?i tried to send my dad’s picture to the men who look like kenny rogers site, but they never posted it

So tomorrow I am flying to New York to be on the Maury Povich Show. My girlfriend has told me she has something to share with me. I am really excited. I have never really seen the Maury Show but according to his website “He is a husband, father and grandfather, whose compassion has helped him form a natural bond with guests and viewers.” - This guy sounds all right!

I have been with my girlfriend Crystal for 3 months now and I can?t wait for whatever news she will tell me on the show. She is my rock. I have never been to New York so I am hoping Crys and I can see some of the amazing things N.Y.C. has to offer after our appearance on Maury?s show. Oh, and get this, Maury?s show pays for the WHOLE TRIP! All Crys and me have to do is appear on the show! I can?t wait to meet this guy and shake his hand for doing such good work.