MuchMusic.com | Blog

Before I say “ADIEU MUTHA F***AS!!” and take off for two weeks, let me leave you with this. Click on this link. Do it. DO IT!!!!

THIS LINK

That photo of Britney on the cover of W Magazine is SO AIRBRUSHED that girl looks like Natalie Portman. In fact, I thought it WAS Natalie Portman until I read the headline beneath it. And then I STILL didn’t believe it. Aye, but it IS Britney, looking quite amazing with her shorn ‘do.

IDEA! Maybe I can pay someone to airbrush my face if they can make me look like Nicole from the Pussycat Dolls!! Everything’s coming up me!

OK seriously. Britney’s attire has reached its peak - the lack of proper judgment has accelerated at such a feverish pace, I…I don’t even know what to say in response. I’m speechless.

Take a look. It’s just mind boggling.

I’m super excited to see Spider-Man 3 which comes out May 4th. As a kid, Venom was one of my fave super villains, which makes the anticipation for this movie even greater. But Topher Grace… COME ON!!! I remember Venom having gigantic muscles and being somewhat intimidating. I hope Eric Forman doesn’t decrease the awesome factor of this movie.

Two inexplicable things happened on Wednesday’s American Idol. 1) They opened the phone lines for CHARITY as opposed to soliciting votes for generic adult-contemporary balladeers…and 2) through some computer trickery they had ELVIS singing with CELINE DION…[sound of brain exploding]

First of all, don’t get me wrong, charity good. Getting Madonna, Bono and the rest of the Do-Good Patrol on board to beg was kind of a no brainer, and the results speak for themselves; they raised craploads of money for poor peeps. So that’s great.

The bad: they used old footage of Elvis and composited it together with new footage of Celine Dion, and then made all the footage look crappy and aged and in the process made something altogether ghoulish. Is it REALLY necessary to exhume the King for THIS?

Oh You Celebrities…

On Sunday, a crazed Sandra Bullock fan tried to run over Sandra’s husband, Jesse James.

This is so perplexing to me. Yes, people shouldn’t be running other people over with their luxury cars. But what’s even more odd is that crazed Sandra Bullock fans actually exist. What is it in “Miss Congeniality” (both 1 and 2) that garners Miss Bullock the right to a crazed fan?

OK, OK - yes, she’s quite endearing, “Speed” rocks, and she was good in “Crash.” But “Hope Floats”? “Forces of Nature”? “The Lake House”? These do not equal Crazed-Fan status. I feel sorry for everyone involved.

And on a completely unrelated sidenote, Hugh Grant apparently threw a tupperware container of baked beans at the paparazzi. All I could think was, “Oh, beans…how British of him.”

Can we talk about this for a minute?

If you haven’t seen the Pussycat Doll finale and still want to, AND you want to somehow keep it a secret, avert your eyes NOW.

Ok, first let’s throw in a plug for Rich, who not only bangs out the best Top Model recaps this side of anyplace, but he’s been recapping Search For The Next Doll for VH1. That’s where I shamelessly swiped the hilarious photo you see above, and also where you can see my exact sentiments of the finale.

If you didn’t click that link, it says, “Asia as next kittehcat doll? DO NOT WANT!”

Seriously!

Melissa R was robbed. I would’ve even been cool with Chelsea, cause she was endearing and a terrific singer (and Robyn loovvvved her!). But Asia?! Sorry if you’re on her team, but I don’t want to hear her sing, I don’t want to see her fingers fluttering on the mic, and I don’t want to hear her yell at Melissa in the middle of the night. Ok, I do want to hear that. That sh*t was entertaining.

If I ever see PCD live again (I’ve done it before, and I will NOT be shamed), will I be interested in Asia’s progress? Meh. I would totally want to know how Melissa or Chelsea were coming along, in fact, I’d probably be a wee bit psyched to see them. NOT ASIA! I dunno - I’m just not feeling her.

Ok, I will say this - I was impressed (and a little teary) when she helped Chelsea with her dance moves in the second last episode. And she did impress at the challenge. Otherwise, Asia, nosoupforyou.