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We start the ep with our 13 finalists making the figurative leap from the high seas to the comfort of their hybrid transport and then to their environmentally-friendly home on dry land (I’m sensing a theme…and it’s green)…and all without even breaking a nail! I think some of them lost track of their brains and dignity somewhere along the way…but that means more interesting shenannigans for us down the line, so I’m not complaining!

So apparently this show has jumped on the celebrity message bandwagon and this week the message they want to teach us is that…wait for it…smoking is bad! Stay tuned next week when we learn that we need to “Just Say No” to drugs and that recycling is good. Are their seriously people out there who don’t know this? Wow. The girls’ shoot shows us the two sides of smoking…the glamourous facade and the medical side-effects. So smoking is both fierce and gross…interesting perspective. Mila, my least favourite so far, thinks her chemotherapy hair is hysterical…so she wins my “Prized Idiot” award for the week. I still cannot believe they picked this ditz over that girl from Alaska! After the shoot, Bianca lays the smack down with Lisa making it clear that a lap-dancer won’t ever be chosen as the Top Model. Clearly Bianca has never watched the show before. Bianca apologises but cops to the fact she only did it so that her nasty side won’t become an issue with the judges. Again, she has clearly never watched this show…the bitchier you are, the longer you remain around to keep things interesting! It’s Top Model 101.

The Challenge for the week involves each of the girls showing off their personal style using clothes from Old Navy. Hmmm…I don’t know about you, but I shop there occasionally and they only have one style to begin with. Saleisha manages to stand out somehow and wins the chance to appear in an ad and a $1000 shopping spree in the store, which means she should be able to get about 999 pieces of clothing all of which will fall apart after she’s worn them once. I joke, I joke…sort of.

You knew Heather’s Asberger’s Syndrome would come into play sooner rather than later and it does. The girls constantly talk about how weird she is and she’s starting to feel them push her onto the sidelines as the resident “freak”. This girl is not prepared to stay there, however, and seriously takes the girls to task in front of Tyra and the judges…I liked her before but know I’m kind of rooting for her. Also growing on me? Ebony. She’s reined in the bitchy behaviour but apparently that’s what gave her that model glow because she lands in the bottom two with Mila (rock on!). I was really hoping they’d give Ebony another chance…and thankfully, they do. Mila “Cancer is Funny” is going home - so why was she even here in the first place? Whatever.

Tyra takes the opportunity to build on the fact this season is all about sending, like, positive messages and stuff to all those impressionable girls out there. Didn’t they already do a model with causes shoot last season? They really should’ve saved that. But her big announcement? No smoking for the rest of the competition…they are putting their money where their finely stenciled mouths are (in a manner of speaking) and following up on the message they want to send. One small, teetering stilettoed step for females everywhere…

Tune in next week when the DTs hit the girls and the bitches come out to play!

I don’t know about you guys, but I thought this show got a lot better in this episode. Am I completely sold on it yet? Not quite…but I’m still willing to give it some time to improve some more. On that note - here’s what went down:

Dan spends a good portion of the episode enacting his very own version of Waiting for Godot, as he literally stands outside her building and just waits for her…having awkward conversations aplenty with Lily and with Nate. Nate gives him the solid advice that sometimes women are just hard to understand…wow, free faux-deep platitudes, how kind of him. You know what else is hard to understand? What B and S see in him…but I digress…

We also get to see some nice Lily and Rufus (or as I shall now call them, Loofus) interaction - where we learn a little bit more of their past together. The bad? Rufus apparently hasn’t seen the useful end of a showerhead in awhile and needs to clean up his greasy self stat or he is in danger of losing his position as “hottest dad on tv”.

Jenny pays a visit to her new icon, Blair, and doesn’t seem to be at all distracted by the fact that B has apparently wandered in from a 1940’s film noir. Who wanders around with that much makeup and in a negligee? I didn’t even know they still made those! After quizzing Jenny on her erstwhile hero worship of S, B decides to take pity on her new underling and gives her an expensive dress she decides she doesn’t want anymore. Jenny, consider your soul sold for a piece of haute couture - for shame.

All the pretty people then attend a brunch thrown by Chuck’s dad - including Dan, who S invites to join her, but excluding Rufus and Jenny, who spend the day as poor people do - chatting about blogs and shopping (naturally). I wish I was poor enough that I could shop all the time. Chuck and Dan start to re-enact the rumble scene out of West Side Story (can’t wait to see their high kicks and pirouettes) but end up getting pulled apart before either one of them can get crowned the Ryan Atwood of this particular class warfare dance number.

S (aka worst date ever) abandons Dan in favour of trying to find out why her BFF is giving her the cold shoulder. Her answer comes from Nate who admits to spilling the beans about their hookup. S is naturally not happy and her angelic demeanour slips as she gets into a major argument with B. There’s a lot of unflattering names flying around, all of which are awesome and bang on. It is at this point that Serena’s character finally seems interesting to me…no more victim-like martyr attitude so I say bring on more of that bitchiness! Despite all this, Nate and Blair…or Nair as I shall now call them…remain together. Hookay. Chuck, being the gentleman that he is, decides to spill the beans about Nate and S to Dan, who doesn’t take it well…but manages to give Chuck a matching black eye to go with the other before taking off. I say keep running, Dan, these people are so not worth your time (or your hotness). Go back to your hot dad and your cute sister and forget about this crazy, lunatic fringe!

Things I Liked:

- They cut back on the Gossip Girl interludes but when she did pipe up, her lines were good and less cheesy. Also, Kristen Bell continues to deliver her lines with a panache unmatched.
- The music continues to rock. The Music Supervisor for this show has worked on both The O.C. and Grey’s Anatomy, so it’s no wonder…I want to be her when I grow up.
- Dan. He’s hot…his family is awesome. Give them their own spin-off and can everyone else.
- Blair. She’s a bad girl but they’ve done an excellent job of giving glimpses that their is more than meets the eye.

Things I Can Give or Take at This Point:

- Loofus. I am slightly intrigued by their past but still don’t see much chemistry between them…but I want to like their story. The jury is still out.
- Serena. She is supposed to be the centre of the show but except for that glimpse of her inner-bitch, I’m not feeling it.
- Jenny. I like her but riding the fence between good and evil (S & B) will get old quickly, so I hope they give her more to do.

Things I Wouldn’t Miss If They Suddenly Disappeared Down a Black Hole:

- Chuck. Rich bad boy stereo-types have been played to death - if they don’t give him layers soon (see Logan in Veronica Mars), I’m not interested.
- Nate. His personality is flying so low, it’s beneath the radar. I wouldn’t notice if he disappeared all together.

Episode Rating: C-

What does everyone else think? Are you going to keep watching? or has it lost your interest already?