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Started from the bottom
February 9th, 2009
Last week: Some crews were good, some people were meh. Team Millennia went home.
AND NOW, this week’s theme is the “Wack Track Challenge”. What does that mean, exactly? Crews are asked to bring new flavour to old school dance songs, and from the looks of video clips, it looks like we’ve got some “Achy Breaky Heart” coming up. Oh god. Please don’t be predictable and give to the cloggers.
The crews come out on stage, and according to cheer volume the runaway faves so far are Beat Freaks and Quest Crew. Deservedly. Mario announces the first group safe from elimination, and it’s Quest. Duh.
Slater explains that each crew will be given one of the most cliche dance tracks of all time, songs that spawned uber-lame dance moves. This is a fun idea! Their challenge it to make these dance moves look cool. Some things are just impossible.
(for some reason there were no Quest Crew photos, so I had to use this one! Note a Striker in the bkgd)
Quest Crew are given “The Right Stuff” by NKOTB, mahaha. They reckon that the pendulum move has to go in there, naturally. The routine is tons ‘o fun, but I don’t think as good as last week. Hok pulls off this amazing upside-down illusion and Dominic drops his pants. The audience goes crazy. Judges? O HAI Mama and your yellow, bedazzled pill cap. Whoa. She loves how clean they were, and the crazy stunts; Shane points out how inventive they are and that “y’all can’t be touched.”
Slater reveals that Strikers All Stars move on, and Brooklyn boys Ringmasters are in the bottom 2. I like them, but I saw it coming – they’re just not vibing with the mainstream audience. We go to Strikers’ tape, and see that they get MC Hammer’s “2 Legit 2 Quit” – somehow, they’ve got to make that dumb hand dance look dope. Therein lies the challenge. Their live performance is steaming with hotness, but seriously – there’s no way to make those finger movements fierce. JC loves their energy, but reminds them to keep the movements clean. Mama thinks they’re incredible and Shane says that they killed it.
NEXT, there are 3 crews left to discover their fate: Beat Freaks move on. Dynamic Move on (surprise?). Fly Khicks will dance for their lives in the bottom 2.
Beat Freaks up next – they get “Pretty Fly for a White Guy”, HA. They’ve gotta incorporate The Carlton dance into the routine, which is actually a part of my repertoire even today. The girls are like, we’ve gotta get out our inner whitey, cause rock is not in their comfort zone. The performance is ill, and they pull out a JC t-shirt, zing! Then run over to ask for his autograph. Saucy. He’s like, “I can’t think straight right now”. Slater points out that this is the first time the show has seen a girl do a headspin, and Shane is overwhelmed. Mama shouts out to a mother in the group, and says, “you gave ME energy”.
Dynamic Edition are up next, and ohhh nooo – they get Billy Ray. On one hand it’s like, “IT ONLY MAKES SENSE”, and on the other hand it’s like, “how predicable can you be?” One girl says, “this is the first song I ever clogged to.” Ha. There’s some drama in the group during practice, and I’m trying to figure out if the drama queen is Brandon or that chick with the short hair. Anyway, they clog, it’s succinct, and the judges praise them. Mama says it was amazing and flawless. Shane announces that the performance put them on the map, and finally they were just being them.
The bottom 2 teams perform next, with Ringmasters up first. They get “Macarena” and one guy is like, “WHAT THE F*CK”. Hahaha. This should be interesting. They manage to come up with something that’s super fun and even though I feel like they’ll be off this week, at least they went out with something that shows progress and a sense of humour.
Fly Khicks perform right after, and they’re given “Everybody Dance Now”. It’s super sassed out and quite good – I do like these ladies, even if the soft spot may just stem from our shared love of sneakers. The judges offer thoughts on both crews – JC was worried about Ringmasters getting “Macarena” but declares that they brought major swagger. Shane respects Fly Khicks cause he can tell they’re dancing to win. Mama loved the girls vs boys battle, and mentions that she can tell the Ringmasters are growing; also says that the girls of Fly Khicks are so strong.
But the ending hurts, and one crew must go… and it’s the boys from Brooklyn that must exit the stage. One dude climbs up the stage and flips off – at least they went out with a big bang.
Slater’s 5 Worst Puns This Week:
* “Can Quest Crew Rock the pendulum and swing voters in their direction?” PLEASE.
* (After performing to “2 Legit”) – “If you think Strikers All-Stars are legit, call in…” TOO EASY.
* “Can Dynamic Edition come together and get line dancing straight?” OK, I’LL GIVE YOU THAT ONE.
* [After performing to "Achy Breaky Heart] – “If you don’t wanna break Dynamic Edition’s heart, vote for them!” NOT EVERYTHING HAS TO BE A PUN, SLATER!
* “Can they nail the running rabbit and stay in the running?” YOU’RE NOT EVEN TRYING.