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Break up lines you feed your ex and what they really mean

June 4th, 2014


Avril Lavigne was heard praising her ex-husband and Sum 41 front man Deryk Whibley on his newly found sobriety after he had a serious health scare last month. Avril told a Toronto Radio Station that Deryk “is a good guy” and that she wants “him to be happy and healthy”.

Now – while we have no doubt that Avril is being sincere here – we know that not all interactions with your ex are as they seem – especially over text. Today we are gonna play a little game of “What they said” and “What it means”:


Break up texts
I need to focus on me.

I don’t deserve someone as good as you.

We are at different points in our lives.

Maybe one day we can be friends.

I just can’t do this anymore.

When they try to get in contact with you

Sorry- my phone has been acting up.

I’ve been on vacation.

Things have been really busy at work.

After you see them

It was so great to run into you.

I heard you have been dating again.

How is your family?

Funny, I was thinking of you.

You look great!

Let’s hang out sometime.

We should text more often


Break up texts
I need to focus on me getting with someone hotter.

I deserve someone way better.

You’re at the point where you still want to be with me and I kissed that point goodbye a long time ago.

On facebook. On limited profile.

And by “this” I mean “you”

When they try to get in contact with you

I’m ignoring your calls

Vacation from talking to you

I erased your number

After you see them

If only I had left my house 5 minutes earlier.

I saw it your profile on Ok Cupid.

Is your brother still single?

…and how I wasted so much of my LIFE with you!

Wow! You put on some weight. Glad I dodged that bullet!

Let’s never hang out.

I need to change my number right now.

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