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September 16th, 2013
Dear Britney Spears,
Remember how excited I was to hear your new single, Work Bitch, last week? I had so much faith in you and was so excited for you to squeeze onto that throne next to Katy Perry and Lady Gaga. I went to work with dancing shoes on and everything, but alas, I’m not dancing right now.
Work Bitch…what the hell was that? Look, I know you can do better than that. That’s nowhere near your best work and with the crazy impressive team of writers and producers you have working with you right now — will.i.am, Sia, Charli XCX, Hit Boy — there must’ve been something better you could’ve put out. This isn’t getting me excited, this is making me concerned.
The track itself uses a boring, generic dance beat that DJs must have in their DJ starter pack. It’s a pre-programmed option when all else fails. That’s the first point. We’ve also come to accept your wonderfully altered voice with autotune turning you into a robotic hit-making machine, but it’s just not doing it for me on this song. None of this is working for me.
“You want a hot body? You want a Bugatti? You want a Maserati? You better work bitch!” — admittedly a great, badass chick in charge attitude you’re boasting and I’ll probably find myself singing this out loud in the upcoming weeks, but the rest of the song is terribly weak. And real talk: WHAT IS WITH THE BRITISH ACCENT? You’re pulling a Madonna on us, Brit. But not in a good way. I didn’t like it on Scream and Shout and I don’t like it here.
Overall, I’m horribly underwhelmed, but I STILL have hope in you and your upcoming album. You can do it, Britney — all you have to do is work, bitch.
Listen to Work Bitch below:Tweet