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NO NO NO
January 30th, 2012
THESE CAPS LOCKS ARE NOT BIG ENOUGH FOR THE OMIGAWDNESS OF GOSSIP GIRL’S 100TH EPISODE!!! Not only do we see Blair walk down the aisle, but we find out Gossip Girl’s identity!
Find out what happened on Gossip Girl’s 100th episode after the jump!
It’s the day of Blair’s wedding and she’s off to Vera Wang for her final dress fitting. The Waldorfs are hosting a rehearsal brunch for all their friends and family, including Louis. Isn’t it bad luck for the bride and groom to see one another on their wedding day? Oh, who am I kidding. This wedding has been doomed all season!
Louis’ best man is delayed in Monaco, so Serena will dance with Dan at the wedding. She still hasn’t told Dan that they can stop pretending to date and I’m not sure that she’s ever going to tell him. That morning Serena had a classic Blair dream that she was Marilyn Monroe and all the men wanted her. That was until Blair appeared dressed as Katherine Hepburn and Dan left Serena for her best friend. Those Upper East Siders. Even their dreams are more high class than ours!
Blair is nervous that something will ruin her wedding and Serena assures her best friend that everything will be fine. Um. it’s episode 100. Something cray cray bettah go down!
The only two people not invited to the rehearsal breakfast are Chuck and Georgina. Georgina is back with a baby and a cute guy who I assume is her accomplice? We never really find out his identity.
Father Cavette shows up at the Empire to go over plans with Chuck on how they’re going to ruin Blair’s wedding.
Chuck pretends to go along with everything, meanwhile serving the priest contaminated water that quickly makes him too sick to do anything about the pending ceremony.
Georgina arrives at Chuck’s apartment thinking he’ll be her biggest ally, but instead finds the sick priest. He loans Georgina a disguise so that she can pass as an altar girl and sneak into the church.
Thankfully, Rufus is paying attention to something other than all the little hats the women in the pews are wearing and spots Georgina. She plans to have Blair catch her seducing Louis, but instead Rufus and Lily confront Georgina and tell her to leave.
Nate is waiting for Dan outside of Blair’s apartment building and of course, runs into Lola, aka the real Charlotte Rhodes. I say of course because, you know, it’s not like New York City has millions of people in it or anything. Lola says hello and reminds Nate that they’ve met a bajillion times. Well done, Nate.
Blair and Serena are getting ready at the Church and Serena admits that she’s still pretending to date Dan. Blair encourages her friend to follow her heart and tell Dan how she really feels. Earth to Blair! Take your own advice!
Eleanor and Dorota gasp at how beautiful Blair looks in her gown, but when the bride catches herself in the mirror she starts to have a panic attack. After calming her daughter down, Eleanor realizes there’s something she has to do.
Chuck is in his apartment with no intentions of stopping the wedding, that is until Eleanor shows up and encourages him to come to the Church with her and tell Blair how he feels.
Chuck goes with Eleanor, but Blair isn’t happy to see him. She tells him that she’ll always love him and loves him more and more each day, but says she wouldn’t be with him even if she wasn’t with Louis. Heartbroken, Blair leaves Chuck in the room and goes off to start her ceremony.
Georgina, being the crafty villain that she is, finds another door that Rufus and Lily aren’t guarding and manages to record the entire conversation between Chuck and Blair. She hands Chuck her camera and tells him to do whatever he wants with the video, knowing that it could ruin Blair’s wedding to Louis.
It’s finally time to walk down the aisle and Blair asks both her father and Cyrus to walk her down the aisle. Imma gonna cry. Louis has asked Dan to be his best man to thank him for writing his vows. Weird, but okay.
It’s almost Serena’s turn to hit the aisle with her long gams, but before she walks anywhere she runs after Chuck and tells him about Blair’s fear of being with him because of the pact she made with God. Chuck looks confused. Join the club. On the way down the aisle Serena tells Dan that she may have done something very bad. You know what’s bad? Not smacking Blair for marrying Louis!
Blair makes it all the way down the aisle and actually looks happy at the front of the Church, until she spots Chuck.
Before Chuck can object to anything the Church erupts with beeping noises as the entire congregation receives a Gossip Girl alert. Haven’t these people heard of vibrate mode? Someone hits play on the newly uploaded video and the acoustics in the building are good enough for everyone to hear Blair declare her love for Chuck. Blair runs off! Is this the end of the wedding?
Nate, Serena and Dan confront Georgina and accuse her of sending the video to Gossip Girl. Georgina points out that all three of them had motive to stop the wedding. You gotta be smart if you’re gonna be the villain!
Blair blames Chuck and he denies sending the video. Still, he tries again to convince her to run away with him and tells Blair that nothing is going to happen to him just because they’re together. Louis walks in the room and Blair promises to never humiliate him again. Before Louis has a chance to respond he walks away to speak with his mother. Right, because this isn’t a decision YOU should make.
The wedding I never thought would happen is back on and the happy (well, maybe not) couple say ‘I do’!
The reception is beautiful and Nate takes this chance to approach Lola and prove that he was in fact paying attention the last time he met her. So I assume they’re going to date? I figured the whole ‘Charlie’ thing wasn’t over.
Serena decides it’s time to be honest and tells Dan that she’s in love with him. Instead of giving him time to respond she asks that they talk later. Doesn’t anyone ever finish a conversation at the same time they start it on this show? I know, I know, it’s episode 100. I should know the answer by now.
Louis and Blair are having their first dance and it looks like Blair is getting her fairytale after all. But this is Gossip Girl, so wait five seconds. Annnnd there it is. Louis tells Blair that his mother told him to go through with the wedding because it would embarrass the family if he didn’t. Their marriage is now just a business deal and Blair has to smile for the cameras and stay married to him until he tells her it’s over.
Panicked, Blair finds her cell phone and calls someone to pick her up.
Chuck runs into the St. Regis looking for Blair, wanting to apologize. But it wasn’t Chuck that Blair called to rescue her. It was Dan!
And then the biggest bomb drops. Earlier in the episode we caught a glimpse of Gossip Girl’s hands, which is the most we’ve ever seen of her. Now we see the whole body – Georgina Sparks!!!!!!!!
But is Georgina really Gossip Girl? GG has been offline since The Spectator leaked her sources, so did Georgina pounce on the opportunity to take over for Gossip Girl? Although it would make sense that it’s her. She’s evil and stuff.
Episode 12: Father and the Bride
Episode 11: The End of The Affair?
Episode 10: Riding In Town Cars With Boys
Episode 9: Rhodes to Perdition
Episode 8: All The Pretty Sources
Episode 7: The Big Sleep No More
Episode 6: I Am Number Nine
Episode 5: The Fasting And The Furious
Episode 4: Memoirs Of An Invisible Dan
Episode 3: The Jewel of Denial
Episode 2: Beauty And The Feast
Episode 1: Yes, Then Zero