Our new fave song
Prepare to cry
NO NO NO
May 21st, 2014
We should all praise Tara the Hero Cat for going above and beyond her duties of lying around and licking herself to save her human boy last week from a deadly, menacing dog. And last night she was recognized at a Bakersfield Blaze baseball game, where Tara threw out the first pitch.
A valiant effort that required a few practice throws, assistance from her human master and a PIECE OF STRING TETHERED TO THE BALL, the first pitch was one of those moments that called for spectators to either laugh and go “awww,” applaud the effort and go “awww” or just suspend belief and see that a cat was full-on throwing out the first pitch.
However, as much as I’d like to give Tara credit for being the only pet that throws balls that is far from true. There are others. Most of which are not cats. In fact, do a Google video search for “cat throwing a ball” and you get this as the top result. So, without further ado, here are a few other animals (mostly dogs) who could also throw a first pitch, should a minor league team need one.
Yes, the only other footage I could find of a cat throwing a ball was of one named Squishy Butt. Not a bad arm on the feline, but really, I feel the only reasons it gets any distance is A) It’s using its claws, and B) It’s a tennis ball, the fuzz of which gets caught in the claws. So how would Squishy Butt fare with a cowhide baseball? Needless to say, he/she would also require a string.
Now Oscar can throw. Maybe he has an advantage, again, because it’s a tennis ball, but Oscar is wise because he throws with HIS MOUTH! Fully aware that he does not have opposable thumbs to wrap around the ball, Oscar kinda shoots/spits the ball out with his jaw. To me, that’s even more impressive. Look at the accuracy!
Sadly, this dog was not named, and so I will give it the temporary name of “Buddy,” because he is the most obvious Buddy I’ve ever witnessed. And because I wish he was my buddy. Anyway, Buddy is very eager to please, and so he puts in all of this effort to return his master’s ball. How does he do it? An underhand motion with his mouth! If you take into consideration that this is a dog, that’s basically the equivalent to a 90 mph fastball. And I should point out that in this trailer for Air Bud: Seventh Inning Fetch, there is no shot of Buddy actually throwing a ball. Oh wait, maybe that’s why I called this dog Buddy…
Again, another tennis ball tosser, and again, another underhander, but I do like how Amazing Dog can rotate between throwing and catching. He’s more of a valuable infielder. Probably a third baseman.
Oops, that’s not a ball. But the elephant totally hit the target.
Of course dolphins can throw balls. They are quite agile and talented in the water. But on a baseball field? Well, that would just be sad, floppin’ all over the place.
Mista The Ball Throwing Budgie
Really, Mista, the ball throwing budgie, is the only other animal I could find who has thrown a ball. He’s not very good at it. In fact, he makes Tara look like Nolan Ryan pitching those two no-hitters in 1973!
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