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Revealed!! Five exotic foods the Calgary Stampede rejected

May 2nd, 2014

scorpion pizza

This week the greatest outdoor show on Earth, the Calgary Stampede, unveiled its unique menu. As always, there are imaginative takes on classic favourites. Between July 4th and 13th, visitors will be able to gorge on such concoctions as the Kawabanga Corn Dog (giant sausage in batter), Deep Fried Cheezies, Deep Fried Donut Bacon Cheeseburgers, Million Dollar Baby Mac & Cheese (mac & cheese with truffle oil, sautéed crab meat and sundried tomatoes) and the most attention-grabbing of all: Scorpion Pizza. As seen above. You can view them all here.

However, we’ve stumbled upon some of the reject food items that were a little too risky to sell at the Stampede. When you take a look, you’ll understand why it was probably for the best these didn’t make the cut.

human finger sandwich
Human Finger Sandwich. Like a finger sandwich, but with real human fingers. Cannibalism hasn’t exactly caught on yet.

cyanide puppie
Slush Puppie with Cyanide. The retro syrup-flavoured slush beverage with a special kick. Problem is, the kick will more than likely kill you.

pootine
Pootine. Pretty gross. Definite health and hygiene no-no. Not sure who it appeals to besides flies.

maggot taco
Maggot Taco. Health experts say live, disinfected maggots can clean dead tissue and prevent infections. They don’t mean by eating them in a hard, corn tortilla shell though.

blownuts
Blownuts. The always popular powdered donut covered in cocaine. Under the Controlled Drugs and Substances Act, this is a Schedule 1 drug, so you’d probably get arrested just ordering one. There’s a reason why Tim Hortons doesn’t bake these.

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