Songs That Are Corrupting Today’s Youth

July 7th, 2008

Once children are too old to watch the happy and innocent Teletubbies and Doodlebops, they move on to Miley and the brothers Jo. And from there, it only gets worse. Pop culture is full of disturbing temptations and what better place to seed such evils than in the lyrics of a song which are then masked by infectious melodies and hip gyrating beats. Currently, there are a few songs on the airwaves that are seriously troubling and corrupting our youth - so I have taken it upon myself to present them to you for what they truly are: dark-sided.

Danity Kane - Damaged

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The 5 young women of Danity Kane look healthy enough, but don’t be fooled; according to Damaged, their recent hit single, they are in some serious distress. What at first sounds like a catchy dance tune, quickly morphs into a screaming cry for help. They stutter, gasp for air, and madly search for First Aid kits, asking for assistance due to multiple heart attacks. (They apparently have holes in their ventricles!) At one point they get so desperate that they even carefully spell out the words “h-e-a-r-t” and “d-a-m-a-g-e-d” in hopes to get their point across. Sadly, four whole minutes later, seemingly no one has come to their aid. Children will surely believe that our Health Care system has left them for d-e-a-d. It’s a bleak look at humanity, Folks - one which will deeply scar your impressionable child.

Rihanna - Take A Bow

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Oh, please - we are on to you, Rihanna. You sang of being a murderous adulteress in your hit, Unfaithful, and you may have gotten away with it then, but not now. With your new ditty Take A Bow you try to turn the tables. Do you really believe that a man who cheats deserves “a round of applause” and a “standing ovation”? Oh right, you would. You are poisoning the minds of today’s youth! Think of the children, Rihanna… Think of the children!

Weezer - Pork And Beans

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Don’t be fooled by the boys of Weezer. Their latest offering, Pork And Beans, is a sneaky tune that will turn the minds of today’s youth to mush. It sneakily tries to grab the attention of the little ones with its Dr. Suess-like lyrics and simple melody. It goes, “Everyone likes to dance to a happy song/With a catchy chorus and beat so they can sing along/Timbaland knows the way to reach the top of the charts/Maybe if I work with him I can perfect the art.” The issue here is, they ARE singing a happy song with a catchy chorus. They don’t NEED Timbaland. Joke’s on us? No, no, Weezer - joke is on YOU. Nothing is worse - NOTHING - than a song that insults our intelligence and the intelligence of our children in one fell swoop.

Madonna - 4 Minutes

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Do we really only have 4 minutes to save the world? Can the World actually be saved in just 4 minutes? Why only 4? And who anointed this Madonna of Pop the conveyor of such divine knowledge? I have no answers, except for one: this song could potentially make a socially-conscious and literally-minded child veeerrrry nervous. It simply breeds paranoia.

Pussycat Dolls - When I Grow Up

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What at first listen can be perceived as a motivational song about the importance of goals and ambitions, is actually a song full of subliminal messages. According to the latest offering from The Pussycat Dolls, when they grow up they want to have “groupies,” but what one subliminally hears is, “When I grow up I want to have boobies.” Not only will such negative messaging breed major issues of body dysmorphia, but when one grows up and wants to have boobies, THIS happens: Busty Heart.

Death Cab For Cutie - I Will Possess Your Heart

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The lyrics go a little something like this “You gotta spend some time with me/And I know that you’ll find love/I will possess your heart.” The song goes on to say, “There are days when outside your window, I see my reflection” and “You reject my advances and desperate pleas/I won’t let you, let me down so easily.” Two words for you: Cree. Py. Children beware: This isn’t a sad song about yearning and unrequited love - this man’s a stalker! - it’s a “I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti” song. Speaking of eating liver…

Nelly Furtado - Maneater

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There is nothing subliminal here, it’s all pretty obvious: Nelly Furtado is a straight-up crazy person. She’s walking into rooms, screaming, demanding attention, moving her body like a nympho, and eating men. In my books, any song that promotes cannibalism is not cool. All that other stuff is fine though.

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11 Responses to “Songs That Are Corrupting Today’s Youth”

  1. wow. this is dumb. none of these songs are corrupting anyone in any way. get a life, seriously.

    you’re mad at weezer? come on. YOU’RE corrupting the youth.

  2. What kind of list is this? Sounds like you’re the kind of person who finds double meanings in anything someone says and takes offense to it.

    By R.T.S on July 7, 2008 at 11:43 am |
  3. I think you are so right!! songs are corrupting our youth! When I first heard “4 min” I was like what! this doesn’t make any sense. How am I going to save such a corrupted world in 4 min! More like I’m gonna save the world in 2000 yrs!! Artist do not even know what they are talking about cause they’re songs does not make any sense!! First they are singing how much they are going to stick by their man and the next they are singing about about much need do not need a man!! For goodness sakes decide what you want and then sing about it!!

    By Marie on July 7, 2008 at 12:32 pm |
  4. umm, im pretty sure u guys r missing the sarcasm in this post :|

  5. Matt and R.T.S… you might want to investigate these concepts known as “irony” and “satire”… might shed some light for you!

    By Dave G on July 7, 2008 at 1:21 pm |
  6. Sarcastically bashing a sarcastic song makes you sound a bit serious, unfortunately.

    But funny stuff otherwise. Ha

    By Kastatic on July 7, 2008 at 4:58 pm |
  7. speaking of liver!!

    ahah…good one. tut.

    By clarice on July 8, 2008 at 12:00 am |
  8. Madonna never has or will be a role model for kids

    By Senester on July 8, 2008 at 1:45 am |
  9. ALL POP MUSIC IS CORRUPTING THE YOUTH OF TODAY. AND YOU CAN ADD HIP-HOP AND RAP TO THAT LIST AS WELL!!!

    whatever happened to the realness of music?? All music is about now days is bragging about how much you own. Or creating a song that is pure shock value and holds no musical relevance whatsoever……for example how you kissed a girl and you liked it. Both disgust me either way.

  10. that is a load of rubbish rihanna dont think that a cheating man needs a round of applause shes being scarcastic and nelly furtado isnt talking about eating men you have to look deeper into the song

  11. Music does not need to make sence. It just needs to sound good. Besides there are a lot worse things out there in the music world then these songs. The majority of rap is poisonous and 92% of teens have moved onto rap. 97% of teens would DIE if the Jonas brothers said it wasn’t cool to breath! And only 8% still rock everyday!

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