The Almighty Kelly

April 16th, 2004

Blog-towns:

I came to the realization this morning that I haven’t heard an album in over five years that blew me on my ass. First there were tears, and then came the wailing. From the fetal position, I pulled myself out of my despair with a single question: what would The Kelly do? I’ve been stalking Kelly for about four months; since she uttered that first demeaning slur at me as I skulked passed her in the hallway of lower much. It’s been a happy, although nerve wracking few months trying to catch a glimpse of the all powerful and intoxicating Kelly. I’ve been lucky in the past few weeks, she’s taken to, well noticing me. She almost knocked me over 8 days ago in the foyer as she walked by me–you see, someone as important as The Kelly can’t stop to walk around a peon like me, no Kelly, our master, needs not wait for no one. And then there was the time I almost broke from my professional appearance and ‘actually’ spoke to her. See, I was coming out of the ladies washroom on the first floor, and The Kelly was coming in. I held the door for her, and as she approached, she walked right over to me, leaned in close, looking at me dead in the eyes and said, “outta my way, loser.” I was overjoyed, I almost hugged her. She noticed me! Can you believe it? me neither.

So what would The Kelly think about the overall mediocrity of the state of music today? Nothing. The Kelly doesn’t have time for such trivial crap. The Kelly is far beyond what little snot-nosed bourgeois brats like me think. And that’s what I did. Forgot about it completely.

Posted on Friday, April 16th, 2004 at 12:41 pm by Anna and is filed under Blog.

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