The Week In Jibba Jabba!

June 2nd, 2006

Check baby, check baby, 1, 2, 3, 4…

Ok Pete Doherty, you can do what you want in your own home or in the company of Kate Moss, but when you hold 142 passengers idle on an airport tarmac, THAT’S WHEN YOU CROSS THE LINE! Man, I hate delays. Ahem, oh yes, how about some background info: Pete was detained onboard a flight to Spain after a syringe was discovered in the airplane’s bathroom (in the toilet). Police met the flight in Barcelona and proceeded to search the plane, while almost 200 presumably ecstatic passengers sat aboard. I wish that was the story I had for my parents when my flight was 19 hours late last summer. That would’ve been awesome.

Dude. There’s no way that Mariah Carey’s legs – or anybody’s legs, for that matter – are worth ONE BEELION DOLLARS. But apparently, that’s what they’ve been insured for. I actually thought it was a million dollars, which has been done before, so it’s not totally crazy. But one billion? Dr. Evil couldn’t even get that for threatening to destroy the world. And Mariah’s legs aren’t even a solid deal, you know? Sometimes they’re not so tasty and therefore not worth even a million. What you see right now is not what you always get, which is the case with Entertainment Tonight anchorwoman Mary Hart. I’m just concerned, you know? (End Rant)

Nick Lachey’s got a new girlfriend! Ooooo, aaaaaah, life goes on. This doesn’t look like a laster anyway, so we’re actually hoping that when Nick comes to the MMVAs he’ll fall madly in love with one of our own and then we’ll have the first scoop on everything that happens – reality shows, pre-nups, superbabies and canned food confusion. Hannah Simone, are you up for this?

Jay-Z is unstoppable. He’s just one big awe-inspiring man chunk, and his empire keeps growing. Case in point: he wants to build a casino in Las Vegas – but this is not set in stone. Keep in mind that this niblet of news is coming from “knowledgeable sources”, but I’m kind of hoping that it’s true. I’m totally on Team Jay-Z.

While continuing their reign of terror in Namibia, Brad and Ang celebrated the birth of Shiloh with a $300,000 donation to the country for impoverished babies. They proceeded to give $15,000 to build a school and community centre in the city of Swakopmund. Those bastards! WHEN WILL IT END?!?! Brangelina’s lawyers also tried to purchase any possible domain names that would be associated with Shiloh, but seem to have missed a couple. In other news, Maddox is back on the blogs and it would appear that he is NOT happy about Shiloh’s arrival. No, not happy at all. Suck it up, mister.

What? K-Fed’s a rat? Say it ain’t so!

And lastly, Jim Carrey’s dating Jenny McCarthy? Ah, well, I guess I can see that happening. They’re both into fart jokes and stuff.

Now let me see you shake your rump like a rump shaker!

PS: See how sexy we look now?

Posted on Friday, June 2nd, 2006 at 5:07 pm by Wendy and is filed under Blog.