blog.MuchMusic.com www.MuchMusic.com

Well ‘allo ‘allo. Top ‘o the … evening to ya.

Remember how 50 Cent had his own flavour of vitamin water? (I “reviewed” it a little while ago) Well, the Vitamin Water company has offered Kelly Clarkson her own flavour of the l’eau-y beverage – ON THE CONDITION that she loses some poundage. And it’s not like they’re kidding. Well, you know, if this is true and stuff. Overheard in a meeting with the Vitamin Water jerks: Kelly – “Screw this. I’m endorsing gummi bears.”

And in other endorsement news, here’s a little something that will teach all the kids a good lesson: Kate Moss made about $7 million last year. This year, she’s apparently raked in $18 mil already. Post coke-blowout. In conclusion, scandal pays. But no matter what Auntie Kate says, don’t do drugs. Stay in school. Drink milk. Eat a sandwich.

Hey. Hey. Shh. Jay-Z and Beyonce aren’t married yet. Now go back and sit in your corner until it really happens. I don’t CARE if you have to stay there for another 3 years. GO.

Now for more boring marriage watch news: Avril and Deryck are said to be rushing plans for their ceremony. This article about it makes things sound so scandalous and pivotal. Like, “a California ceremony is imminent” and guests were “told to book their tickets immediately”. Obviously, if this wedding doesn’t happen, people shall perish.

I think a new trend is order. I think that every week, David Hasselhoff should get kicked out of some sort of festivity. Come on Hoff, make it happen. This week: Wimbledon.

You know, Zach Braff seems like a smart guy. Quirky. Charming. So there can only be one reason why he would be going after a girl like Jessica Simpson. No, wait – two reasons. T and A. Oh, Zach Braff. *shakes head disapprovingly*

And what’s with this Bob Dylan song with an Alica Keys shout out in it? How weird is that?

I’M LEAVING AND YOU CAN’T STOP ME.

PS: Fake sequel posters for Snakes On A Plane. You’re welcome.

Posted on Friday, July 7th, 2006 at 5:33 pm by Wendy and is filed under Blog.

Related Articles:

• The Week In Jibba Jabba!
• Fuel Up With Fiddy
• Zach Braff = Isabella Rossellini?
• Top Three Tips For Back To School Fashion!
• Fall Out Boy & 50 Cent?!