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Holy crap, you guys. This. Week. Sucked.

This week in trash: we don’t care about Star Jones! Aaaand we’re done with that topic.

FREE LIL’ KIM! Oh, what? She’s getting out of jail early? Imagine that. The Queen Bee is set to be released just in time for Independence Day, where at first she will be a little hesitant, tip-toeing out into the open and peering into the sunlight. Then, she will explode in a frenzy of orgies and diamonds.

Mariah Carey has revealed that she only eats purple food three days a week because they are apparently the best foods to protect against aging. And also because grape kool-aid is sooooooooooooooooo good!!!

Dear Fall Out Boy and The Killers. Or maybe just Brandon Flowers – yeah, just him. Anyway, stfu. We are so done with your petit feud.

Jessica and Nick are about to seal their divorce for reals. Sorry to the half a person who still thought they had a chance. Wait, they were married? Haha. Aaaah. I find myself so funny.

Britney wants to move back to Louisiana, blah blah blah. I thought she already had a house there? Oh, and apparently she’s BFF with the mayor of Kentwood cause he seems to know everything about her.

Hey, Tommy Lee is a tough guy again! But Josh Duhamel, although forced to the floor in a tiff with Tommy, comes out on top with the burn of the week: “Tommy Lee, who cares?”

Ashlee Simpson is reported to have seriously considered and then turned down a $4 million offer from Playboy. Man, I woulda really liked to have seen that new nose in its full glory. PS: Smart move, Ashlee! No Playboy for you.

Tori Spelling drama to the extreme!

We were going to hire DMX as the spokesman for our “be a good person” campaign, but we changed our minds.

Happy CANADA DAY! Now where’s my fire crackers…

Posted on Friday, June 30th, 2006 at 5:17 pm by Wendy and is filed under Blog.

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